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LOS ANGELES, CA — This past weekend, Los Angeles’ gun buyback was deemed a huge success, as over a thousand firearms were individually exchanged for a $200 Ralphs grocery card. Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa said that it was such a success that LA officials are now going to implement a cold-blooded murderer buyback within the next few months. Speaking at City Hall in downtown LA, Villaraigosa had this to say: “Now is the time to change the landscape of LA and turn in anybody you know who is a cold-blooded murderer. With guns off the streets, it’s time to get our cold blooded murderers off the streets, too.” He noted that turning in one cold-blooded murderer will get you a gift card to CVS, but it’s value had yet to be determined at the time of publication.